hi bab well i started work last week and its not going to bad i still think of you all the while though. i went to see sharon last week thank you so much for the hug i needed that i ache to feel your arms round me. this pain is awful les ive never known pain like it i started crying on saturday [again] and it brought me to my knees, sometimes it feels like ive been crying forever. sharon said im not coping well without you thats an understatement, i thought i was stronger than this but then i always had you to fall back on didnt i and now im on my own and its so hard. people are so kind les but theyve got their own lives to get on with. i wish you were still here and i know i keep saying it but its all i can think of, you are all i can think of im probaly getting on your nerves but you are just going to have to bear with me sorry bab. ive been to look at your flowers today and i will bring some fresh on thursday cos they will be ready for changing then, do you remember when you told me you wanted to be buried and i said i wasnt bringing flowers every week well that was a farce wasnt it, but you know what id buy flowers every day forever if i could have one more day with you. i know i keep saying it les but i miss you and love you so much i cant even begin to tell you what i feel in my heart all i know is that i dont think i can stand this pain much more anyway see you soon sweetie love you xxxxx